Monday, December 27, 2010

Vacation's End: When the Parent Becomes the Child

My (Rob's) mother has been visiting and staying with us for the last 6 days. With her short-term memory loss she forgets things she said 10 minutes before... and sadly it's getting more and more frequent. That's not a problem, though - it's behavior. As my mom has aged she increasingly behaves like a spoiled child who needs to be the center of attention 24/7 and gets ticked if she's not. She got angry at Tom on Monday because he told her that I have to work from home and she shouldn't bother me. He said "talk to me, not Rob because he has a job to do." She went in the guest room, shut the door and pouted for 2 hours. She wouldn't speak with Tom until Tom brought her back instant lottery tickets (like a little kid getting a present).
  She leaves Tuesday to fly to Providence, RI, and that airport is open despite the blizzard (I checked hourly).  We're worn out and stressed.
   Living with someone is totally different from visiting them. I love my mother very much, but liking her behavior and impatience with others is not something I like. A priest once told me that "you love them because they're your family, but you don't have to like their behavior." So true.
  So, how did I get her to fly on her own when she was afraid to fly? I was able to get a message from her mother (who passed in 1959) who provided me clues about things I had no idea about... (like a yellow knitted shawl and a piece of jewelry) and told me that she'd be with my mother as she travels.... so she got on the plane. I'm so glad I have this gift! :)

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Gift/Memorial Suggestions

Several of our friends have lost loved ones (human and pets) and we found that one of the best ways to honor their memory is to give to an animal charity.
What better way to recognize a life of love, than by giving another life a chance for love?
We donate to many animal rescues, but because we volunteer with
DC Weimaraner Rescue and Coast-to-Coast Dachshund Rescue, those are our 2 favorites.
Consider giving the chance of life to a dog or cat.

About us

We're two married guys who enjoy the simple things in life, especially our dogs. We volunteer for dog rescues, enjoy splitting dinners, exercising, blogging, helping friends and neighbors, ghost investigations, coffee and tea, Tudor history, weather, superheroes, comic books, mystery novels, traveling, 70s and 80s music, classic country, piano, gardening, writing books on ghosts and spirits, architecture, keeping a clean house, cooking simply, and keeping in shape. You'll find tidbits of all of these things on this blog and more.

Tom and Rob Thinking Hard!

Tom and Rob Thinking Hard!
Wondering what home project to do next